Monday, February 04, 2008


It's pretty amazing to be faced with the menagerie of possibilities that your future child can be. Since we chose not to find out the sex this time (though trust me--every time the ultrasound tech told me I might want to look away so as not to find out on accident, I was staring intently at whatever I thought was a private part, convinced I'd see some hint--but to no avail) it's an even broader spectrum of imagination. Dark hair or light, straight or curly, boy or girl. And then with any assumption of one of the previous options, another flow of thoughts stem--ballet or soccer? , tomboy or mama's boy?, mini-skirt battles or (ugh!) making bike ramps out of plywood?
It's crazy to think that in less than 19 weeks, our lives will be changed so incredibly. Our baby will become our big kid (the thought is already making me cry) and we'll be carrying around another tiny little person, two carseats, maybe even a double stroller....and oh....sleep deprivation, how could I forget.
But what's more amazing is that right now there is a tiny little secret growing inside me that only God totally knows. There are weeks of everyone's lives, months even, where the only entity totally aware of who they are and what they will become is God. Right now my baby is totally known to the creator of the universe. He alone knows the hair patterns, the fingerprints, the tiny feet, the gender. And He has his own amazing name for him or her. Right on the other side of my stomach, separated to me only by skin and tissue and organs (mere inches) is my future son or daughter and I have no idea what they are like.
"To imagine is everything, to know is nothing at all." -Anatole France

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

wow. incredibly written. make sure you keep this forever to show him/her in the future.

you are such an awesome mom. this baby is very lucky to have you and it doesn't even know it yet.